I was chatting to someone at the gym this morning about how I have achieved what I have. I do get asked it by quite a few people now and anyone who reads this blog will see just how I have, but it inspired me to write a little bit about the journey I have been on and how it has affected me and my life so drastically.
It started for me on the 1st January, so a while before I started this blog. It wasn't initially inspired by me getting engaged, it was at that point I felt inspired to start blogging. What set it off was me feeling utterly disgusting after binging my life away for many, many years.
What I didn't ever foresee, was the scale of the impact that it would have on my life in general. I have been a work in progress for myself for many years from an emotional point of view, and embarking on this mission has made all of my hard work in that respect, finally fall into place.
The health and fitness way of life has become an obsession to me. I get so much enjoyment out of trying to understand myself physically, as I have done for many years emotionally (that wasn't quite so enjoyable, by that's for another blog, another day) I also love my life revolving around this constant thirst for self improvement and the results just keep on coming. I have always had a desire to better myself, but on an intellectual level this doesn't come naturally and it isn't sustained. I never thought for one second I could achieve what I have and I am so immensely proud of myself for how far I have come. For me to be able to whole heartily say that is an achievement in itself. I am never proud of myself, being a perfectionist makes sure of that; yet with this, I can say that I have put in all my effort to all of my ability, I have achieved amazing things and I am genuinely good at it!
I didn't realise that I could look how I do, and what started as wanting to lose a bit of podge has morphed into me wanting to sculpt my ultimate body. It may not be a body that everyone wants to aspire to, but that is why this journey is just so brilliant, because it doesn't matter one jot what anyone else thinks. This is Project Me from start until the day I die and I am loving it and loving how I now look and feel.
Talking totally from an aesthetics point of view doesn't give this situation justice. Exercising regularly and eating well has had an enormous impact on me emotionally. I am much more laid back and level headed, I can think more clearly and there are times now where I actually feel intelligent and take a moment to appreciate myself. This is something that has never happened to me before and I love it. Having people say that I have inspired them to change their ways is also incredibly rewarding to me and just compounds everything I think. I am good at something, something that a lot of people around me aren't good at, and that is a new experience for me.
All I can say, if you are in a position where you feel a bit rubbish and messed up; get out there and get on it, understand your body and how much of an incredible thing it is. Appreciate every function that it carries out behind the scenes and respect what is going on without you consciously doing anything!! If you take a step back, you will be so blown away by your own being that you will never want to make it suffer again. And when you start to do the best you can, the rewards are endless.
I have had an immense amount of support from Tom throughout this and he has embarked on a journey of his own and come a long, long way. I don't know if he feels that it has impacted him emotionally in the same way, but what I do know is that he is constantly learning from the improvements that I have reaped from this. My changed outlook on life inspires him all the time and he constantly tells me this, what more could I wish for? Just to touch one person in such a huge way is a privilege and I can only hope that I carry on bringing positivity into others lives for years to come.
I am still a work in progress and I have my low moments along with everyone else, but they are different, they aren't tinged with darkness or uncertainty now. I can't recommend health and fitness enough to anyone. Good luck to you all in everything you chose and I can only hope that you get to experience what I have, everyone deserves to.
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